To Mr. Eusebius

[thehellflowers]

What exactly is going on with you...

And why do I get the feeling you might be related to my memory loss?

Comments

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

...why?

[thehellflowers.livejournal.com]

Because Ignorance isn't an answer. I want. To. Know. Who. I. Am.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

Even if knowing could make you depressed again?

[thehellflowers.livejournal.com]

YES. I WANT TO KNOW WHO I AM, GODDAMNIT.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

Why should that matter? Isn't ignorance bliss?

[thehellflowers.livejournal.com]

Never, is it ignorance an answer.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

...so you want your memories back.

[thehellflowers.livejournal.com]

Of course. Cogito Ergo Sum. I THINK THEREFORE I AM. AND WITHOUT MEMORY I AM NOTHING.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

ALL of them?

[thehellflowers.livejournal.com]

I AM NOT ME WITHOUT THEM.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

...I'm glad we agree.

::Bampfs mental blocks away~ Memories of the past day or so would, of course, be intact still.::

[thehellflowers.livejournal.com]

... I hate you, Erland.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

Oh? Obviously your memory has returned~

[thehellflowers.livejournal.com]

Asshole. I'll admit. I was being depressed... But I will miss you.

You're a horrible person.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

I will miss you as well, Vidya. I think I made that much obvious.

I freely admit it~ Although I do wonder what, in particular, you mean.

[thehellflowers.livejournal.com]

Mmm...

Hmm?

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you finally got out of your depression though. It was getting rather... worrisome.

What, exactly, do you think makes me horrible? It's nice to have a reference to go on~

[thehellflowers.livejournal.com]

I needed the slap to my face...

That you play games like these.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

Yes, you did.

Heh, well, games are half the fun~

And in my defense, I DID try to talk you out of it first.

[thehellflowers.livejournal.com]

Thanks.

Not to me, Erland...

Well, I wanted it...

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

Well, you do like things structured. Although I think you might be getting a sense of humor in a way...

Do you STILL want it?

[thehellflowers.livejournal.com]

How so?

Not unless you can erase the evidence of me, you, and people's memories. Which I doubt. Knowing who I am... though... feels well.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

Sarcasm, mostly.

While it's technically possible, I noticed even with just the memory blocks I put in place with you there were gaps... I really wouldn't trust myself with something like that again.

I'm glad you're finally happy, even knowing who you are and were. As you've realized though, just because you know who you were doesn't mean it defines who you are or will become.

[thehellflowers.livejournal.com]

Sarcasm, I suppose works, doesn't it?

Gaps? Care to clarify...

I hate who I am. Doesn't mean I can't be something better.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

Indeed.

You still felt a slave-like obligation to me, if subdued, and you seemed to have knowledge of the name Kirihana Kanna without being expressly told. Other, lesser things come to mind, but that's the highlights.

You're really not that bad, Vidya. Your past is just a bit screwed up due to Jigokubana.